D BEST INSPIRED COACHING

BE – the change you want to see in the world

Redefining a famous quote: Being content in the present moment is the change you want to see.

RELATIONAL WELLBEING

Deb Best

9/1/20263 min read

The typical understanding of “be the change you want to see in the world” is to take action on the shortcomings we notice. If we want compassion, be compassionate; if we want to better the environment, then take action to protect and improve it. Social change begins with personal practice.

But there is a different way to see it.

When we read the statement carefully, we notice that the call to action is rooted in dissatisfaction. Something external is judged to be not as it should. From this perspective, something or someone is wrong and needs to be fixed. We imagine that once fixed, satisfaction will follow. So we are compelled to act against whatever has become a thorn in the side of our happiness.

Notice the judgement implied in these perspectives. The focus on an individual – your – point of view and assumed rightness of that perspective. The assumption of wrongness in the world and thereby in others. The call to action is a need to strive, perhaps fight, to win happiness. The statement implied you and I are problems, for we are falling short of what the world needs. If we had been doing things better, the world’s problems might not be as they are.

The message is clearer: You and I are not good enough.

Read it again: Be the change you want to see in the world. Can you sense the scorn now? The disdain aimed at each of us, personally. The assumption of wrong, and that whatever you are doing now, is insufficient. You might be struggling or striving, dealing with so much, caring for so many already, but still failing.

As an integral coach and business leader, self-worth is a constant theme permeating organizations and our society. It seeps into relationships, workplace practices and even our aspirational statements, calling us to action out of scorn and guilt. We strive to achieve, become perfectionist and celebrate successes on an assumption that these actions will bring happiness, , or at least a sense of security, belonging or being okay. Often we can find ourselves in conflict with others who are barriers to our efforts; barriers to be overcome and subdued.

With this context, I am rewriting the statement.

BE – the change you want to see in the world.

Assume you are worthy. Assume you are whole, cared for and wanted, just as you are. You have no shortcomings to correct before you are worthy. There is no judgement.

Simply, be. Breathe.

Sense who you are now. Nothing about this moment needs to be different for you to be worthy. You can recognize what is happening without making yourself wrong for being where you are. You don’t need to struggle to be safe. You are perfectly unique as the only you there is.

In this moment, you matter. In this moment, you are free to feel satisfied and to not need anything more: no more stuff of any kind can make this moment any more than it is. Contentment is not something attained when everything goes our way; it is a relationship with the present moment. No external achievement can make you more worthy than you already are.

Being content in the present moment is the change you want to see.

It’s what we all want. To BE content, here and now, and in every moment to come.

So what about that social change?

Action rooted in wholeness arises differently. Not from judgement or failure or fight, but from joy and care. Action rooted in judgment, failure and fight is often short-lived and creates disharmony. Action rooted in joy and care burns longer, with deep purpose and conviction.

Whatever a person chooses from a place of contentment is a gift.

From contentment, people often choose to contribute—not because we need to prove our worth, but because we care. Often, we join with others and create something greater together.

These steps do not necessarily come quickly. Inspiration to give often takes time to arise

A new lens…

Conventional interpretation & hidden psychology

The world is wrong → I need to change it → then things will be better.
The problem is me → I need to change myself → I must strive to become enough.

Reinterpretation

I am worthy → I don't need to change to be enough → I am free to BE.
I am whole → I can act from joy and care → I contribute to others.

The world doesn't need me to become enough. It needs me to BE fully and authentically myself.

And from that place, choose how I will live a life inspired by purpose.

Walk with me

D Best Inspired Coaching

In the spirit of respect and truth, I honour and acknowledge that I live and work within the traditional, ancestral and unceded territories of the xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam), Sḵwx̱wú7mesh (Squamish), and səlilwətaɬ (Tsleil-Waututh) Nations.

Acknowledgement

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